Posts Tagged ‘time’

“Again”

“Again” by Esmond Ng 28/07/10 © Copyright

Another year briskly it’s time again,
How age catches outruns our each day.
On not how each candle adds to date,
But on our virgin meet 27 shinings away.

5 and 2 months; resemblance to yesterday,
Though blink of eye, yours vividly remain.
I wonder if the flowers its’ scent will one day,
Be erased; forgotten, our Time in some place.

Know not when this silence of summer’s night fade,
My memories they bring me to that very first fate.
And before Time its habit to slip away,
This year once again, wishings; a Happy Birthday.

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“Life’s Best”

“Life’s Best” by Esmond Ng 09/07/10 © Copyright

The memories we have, the times we shared.
All our smiles and laughter, I will not forget.
And as Life takes you where your destiny threads,
Go forth I wish you, with Life’s every single best.

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“In Memory”

In Loving Memory of Stephanie Tan Lai Chan (23/01/89 – 01/01/10)

“In Memory” by Esmond Ng 02/01/10 © Copyright

I would see you almost every other day,
But yet you, I’d not know beyond your name.
Too few hellos and goodbyes we’d have,
Time too haste, too fast to chase.

We shared too, too little exchanges;
Of hearty smiles and laughter candor.
Of our ups and downs, and cheer and fears.
Fair in times like these never, know not I will ever.

I’d never know how your demeanor,
Of what your friends about you say.
How you’d react to the funny things, I have yet no chance to say.
Know not I will ever, this friend I have yet to truly make.

For our God has chosen for you,
To His bosom side to stay.
And though we’ll all miss you in our each own ways,
We’d like you to know, you were not in vain.

For your memories and image they live on,
In those whom sighted you as you blazed along.
Like a comet gone too soon,
We’ll reminisce till we’re blazed out too.

In three weeks 21 you’d be,
“Happy Birthday, Steph!” to you from me.
A final teary “Goodbye” for now it seems,
Hearts, your family, friends and me.

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“Kelly’s Garden”

“Kelly’s Garden” by Esmond Ng 18/11/09 © copyright

One of palettes and scents aplenty,
With breaths of each become more compelling.
That this Garden which so seemingly unassuming,
Is really worth one’s time in revisits.

Once on the hills with stalks petaled in,
Against the vast ground of evergreens,
Contrasts that accentuates your lovely lovelies,
Awed stand I when you I chanced to meet.

For under the sky blues and puffs of white,
There they sit demure and so very poised.
And when in gentle winds they brush across,
Their leaves like hair flows just like yours.

Those to the Garden will sight what I see,
Surely those I describe convert too to attest it.
With each picture my lit eyes are color-blushed,
Long I to Kelly’s Garden again fast.

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“I Pray”

“I Pray” by Esmond Ng 12/08/09 © copyright

I pray for abounding things,
Of most many yen the same.
Unvarnished to ornamented they be,
How fervently amaranthine we seek.

I pray for prime and clean bill,
To forward my trade pursuits.
From which treasure riches return,
All worldly possessions we yearn.

I pray for Love innocent and true,
The meeting of Hearts to hold to.
I pray this turn finally be mine,
This time to find my Valentine.

But all of these I had asked lavish,
I pray equally take from me; banish.
For give rather I in place of these,
That You in replace will all above receive.

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“Happy Birthday!”

“Happy Birthday!” by Esmond Ng 28/07/09 © Copyright

Have a blast; some merriment this day.
Joyful gaiety due none can take away.
And to you all festives will surely give way,
For it be for you that these galas grace.

Though these words replace not how much I have to say,
You of all will know what needn’t be displayed.
It is in times like these when I distanced, I pray:
Longstanding wishes & Happy Birthday!

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“Time in Some Place”

“Time in Some Place” by Esmond Ng 11/03/09 © Copyright

Miraculous it may seem,
Fate works its ways in us beings.
For never did I imagine could be,
What I seek’d in front of me.

Once I hanker’d and once I did receive,
Paints of memories and etch’d it did.
An innocent Romeo & Juliet story,
Coincidences in most everything.

Like the end of tragic Love stories,
Too ours perhaps guileless and naïve.
But these flowers its’ scent can’t be erased,
Even long after they’re gone we had our Time in some place.

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“Silver Linings”

“Silver Linings” by Esmond Ng 11/03/09 © Copyright

Remember I the times sore,
Stricken; afflicted and wretched.
Besetment assail’d from above,
Like the bottomward that downpour’d.

There sat I at sixes and sevens,
Dazed at what just befell.
For at the bridge knew not I,
What wrong I did nor neither fate might.

How did such beauty and perfection cease?
Why my imaginary cloud shapes no longer pleased?
For the bright blessed day of just 5 minutes,
Now overcast acerbity.

Though things may sometimes I never know,
Left unsolved it may best be so.
Memories more precious for there in Heart stays,
But storms will eventually dissipate.

With time I sat the more I knew,
Darkest clouds too come and go.
Silver linings are there always,
When storms pass there they glow.

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“The Lead Box”

“The Lead Box” by Esmond Ng 08/01/09 © Copyright

Choices not apparent the always,
Deceivable most times the case,
If be uninvolved so snap smooth the first place,
Then what of choice would be it in dawning preface?

How we then make verdict of it all?
Consensus concord a volition pray.
For some in haste and foolhardy made,
Regrettable woeful will afflict its place.

Bassanio too was worriment engaged,
For dependent was Portia on his take.
Should gold, silver or lead be his box picked?
Should he cull a coward pick?

As stairs of sand they wear upon their chins,
The beard of Hercules and all their fancy things.
But inward with their milk’d white livers,
So too the precious metal boxes contain.

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“My Bubu Dream”

“My Bubu Dream” by Esmond Ng copyright © 11/08/06

Sugary most not definitely,
Taste if sweetened bifold still lacking.
Why Time still bitter bids me chimera,
When all in alpha was such heavenly.

What more a man can be?
When in dreams his stance airs not his belief.
In reverie when vagary permits,
He chooses silence yet to speak.

They say dreams best for utopian schemes,
Where you are master of all it.
Then why not did I stage a better hit,
Why chose I a tragic love misfit?

I comfort though in succor of relief,
That Thee I glimpsed in beaming bliss.
For this I may never awaken see,
If not my lucid Bubu dream.

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“Purple Butterfly”

“Purple Butterfly” by Esmond Ng © copyright 04/11/05

Purple prose the butterfly,
On flower top did it’s beauty shine.
Slender it’s body yet big,
Its wings of colors in social settings.

So attractive yet exclusive it be,
That all attention should flock around Thee.
For ornate and ever so pretty,
In mind though ago last I long time meet.

Purple in all ancient royalty,
My princess found I in Thee.
That all my world like the flower I be,
Should await your florid setting upon me.

Same feeling in abdomen I get,
Butterflies when you my eyes set.
For it be my heart beats uncontrollably,
When purple prose the butterfly I see.

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How to find Rainbows

Had another dear friend who used to leave this as her nick in MSN. “Everyone goes through storms before finding their Rainbows.” (Source: Unknown) I actually quite agree with that statement. Personally, I found it very encouraging and empowering especially if you’re feeling blue.

Then, I realized an exception to this. What happens if you didn’t go through any storms? What happens if you just happen to walk past one after the storms had past? Does it mean it’s any less of a Rainbow?

It’s human to err. More so, it’s human to neglect and take for granted the lovely things and people around us each and every second. Often, we don’t appreciate them until they’re no longer there. Sometimes, we don’t even see them at all!

There are more Rainbows amongst us than we think. A lot of the time, we get so fixated on wanting to make something a Rainbow, we fail to see the apparent ones around us. We get so resolute on creating a miracle with someone or something that we just can’t see the other marvels occurring besides us. Hence, Esmond’s very own quote for November:

“Question: How do you find the prettiest Rainbows?
Answer: By looking past and around them instead.”
~ © Esmond Ng 04/11/05

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“The Disconsolate Angel”

“The Disconsolate Angel” by Esmond Ng © copyright 06/10/05

Seemingly beyond consolation you lay,
In your tears hidden by the feigning smile you display.
But bystanders they truly see in Thy angelic grace,
That your rainbow will come soon; hold on to your faith.

Thou art remain strong I pray,
The disconsolate Angel in all so beauty’s allure.
If so really Thou’s soul did die when he went away,
How so the world stays in awe when my eyes set on your face?

For not all will appreciate an Angel image,
Just like an unbeliever to a miracle’s envisage.
Wrong he did to you; you so unfairly perceived,
However wrong then you, because he be the one on losing’s receive.

Sometimes Love not work our way,
It’s been so since man can relate.
Not at all smooth our experiences vouch this journey,
But after each means we are closer to our fairy dreamings.

With every heart-felt pain we take away,
Lessons learned, all of which valuable to assist.
After storms, we then know better what future brings,
And what to avoid when rainbow’s gold at end we see.

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“Four Dreams”

“Four Dreams” by Esmond Ng © copyright 30/08/05

The other night you were away,
Out went I, gallivanting amidst boisterous crowds.
Fluttering to music or rather, noises all too loud;
Loneliness did help, aid to plug them out.

How happy you could not see,
My face that moment of message yours I received.
But it must have been noticed my face which gleamed,
For burdened everyone else’s around me.

Seemingly drunk I stammered home,
However fresh your memory I hold untainted close.
That all I can think of is Thee in foreign land remote,
And how far my baby is though under the same moon glow.

After much debate did my eyes actually occlude,
To sleep I thought “Hey, tomorrow will be better posed.”
Serenity tranquil associated to rest not true,
For it seemed my night was terribly consumed.

Four times aroused through the dark slumbers,
Each time I recall, I dreamt of only you.
And once did I cry before from truly forty winks awoke,
How else could my pillow and sheets be soaked?

They say a drunk’s word most honest; it be true,
Wanted to know whose name I’d call if I were juiced.
Wanted to see if in Love really I be with you,
No need an answer now for my seek of candor truth.

For know I this moment where it belongs,
My heart and yearnings; they for you.
At least I fathomed my feelings as honest real,
At least I know now my breath breathes for you.

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Stupid People

I was pondering over Selina’s MSN nick today. “Nothing is fair in this stupid world!!!” Well, life’s really not fair to me. It’s a big bitch I must agree. However, stupid? I’m not too sure. It kept me really thinking. Hence, Esmond’s very own quote for September. It’s not meant to be targeted at anyone, just people in general. In fact, I fall into this category sometimes too.

“There isn’t anything stupid about this world, just people who choose to be.” ~ © Esmond Ng 02/09/05

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“The Absence Of”

Is there such a thing as being cold? You might say: “Of course! My air-conditioner works like a refrigerator!” Well, the truth is that there really isn’t such a thing as “cold”. We can have heat, a lot of it, or sometimes very little of it. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat at all. However, we cannot go any lower than that. There simply doesn’t exist something called “cold”. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy and measurable but cold is not the opposite of heat! “Cold” is a word we made up to describe the lack of heat.

Then is there something called “darkness”? We assume we see it every single night. The truth is…there isn’t! We can have little light, a lot of light, bright light or even flashing light. Darkness isn’t the opposite of light, it’s just the lack or absence of it. If there is such a thing called “darkness”, wouldn’t we be able to make it darker?

Similarly, we don’t have “death”. Death doesn’t exist as a substantial thing. It’s also not the opposite of life. Death is just the absence of life.

I was talking to a dear friend two nights back. She was saying that she can’t and/or doesn’t feel pain anymore. Immune, you might think? What did I say? “It’s not that you don’t feel pain, you just forgot how happiness and joy felt like.” My reasoning?

“Pain is not the opposite of Happiness. It’s the absence of it.” ~ © Esmond Ng 13/09/05

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“How can you not know where it be?”

“How can you not know where It be?” by Esmond Ng © copyright 09/08/05

I remember everything you ever told me,
That examples many I can quote Thee.
How can Thee not know where it be?
That your Heart belongs to who with?

“That sooner or later people will know” shows it.
“That with Thee’s each missing of me” shows it.
“That with you have changed driver” shows it.
“That with each other’s face cringed” shows it.

“With each time you show me to others” proves it.
“With each penguin’s nod agreeing u miss me” proves it.
“With acknowledging already me your new driver” proves it.
“With each lovely and concerned word you speak” proves it.

Each kiss and hug that lands on other each,
Each intimate moment you could not have faked it.
Even to extent for my good Thee wanted to hurt only,
So that I may move on but you suffer silently.

“How can you not know where It be?”

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“The 166″

“The 166” by Esmond Ng © copyright 09/07/05

It’s all at variance; the feeling now after ye move.
166 a place dear now seems so at ease.
Leisurely seated on the blue-tiled stool as writing these,
For depart’d fear of chance you’d see my doing this.

Not ever hoped I that I may glimpse of Thee,
Nor ever dreamt that my sight would cross with Thee’s.
But solace seeking and relish that I stay here,
Near my very own yellow-signed love story.

Even though Thou’s shadow has shifted expectedly,
More of a memory, a picture frame in mind it hath left me.
Yes, it may look silly or crazy some have deem’d.
To this special place frequent I still constantly.

The taint’d white cat cuddles up next to me,
As if it knows me, of my solitary misery.
Occasionally it steals glances; those that pierce right through the soul,
It be like saying: “Easy, I feel for you for I the same fate be.”

Still my thoughts would often play cruel tricks on me.
Thinking how nice it would be if all can restart from time on bridge.
For then, it would still feel like an eternity;
An eternity so perfect in fairy dreams.

How heart-wrenching that sound of bus should pull alongside me,
Snapping me out of my own world; this world of poetic release.
So as light breeze this night ends this week abruptly,
My leaving likened to Enya’s “Deora Ar Mo Chroi”;
“Tears Of My Heart” it sings indeed.

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“How have you been?”

“How have you been?” by Esmond Ng 16/06/05 © copyright

Not sure if realize Thee, it’s been almost three full moons since last;
That I’ve seen those windows in eyes so lovely.
Last couple of days, can’t help me but thinks’t;
Of you and how Life has treated Thee.

I don’t have much ways to convey, to express.
But only through these words I message my thoughts that hoping you’d read.
That I’m still around wishing best everything for someone special to me.
That till this day, Thou art still amazing vividly.

Though short this period be, to me eternity time so seems.
Many things changed have may, from lodging to even studies.
Simple things these like, I have no benefit of sharing.
And simply no means of even knowing.

For no news is often said of as good news,
Thus I trust that Thee be well doing.
Sincerely I hope it be of this conjured case,
For if otherwise I’d be truly sad; hurting.

Pray I do still, that for you everything smooth sailing.
Many times, for my miracle that you’d call me so occasionally.
Most importantly however I need,
Thee be in happy bliss.

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Fate vs Destiny vs Choice

I believe in Fate. Fate is what causes events to happen and brings people to meet. It is something we have little control over. We can always choose where to go or appear, but we wouldn’t have a clue what would happen or the people we get to meet when we’re there.

However, I choose not to believe in Destiny. There are those who lament they’re not meant to successful. They say that they’re destined to fail. They postulate that Prime Ministers are “born”, not made. That they need to be “born” with special skills, characteristics and luck. More often than not, they present tons of reasons or rather excuses for themselves. Such as complicated family backgrounds, lack of support or even name a friend’s influence! Firmly, I beg to differ. Simply because there exists such a thing called “Choice”.

Choice is something that accosts us each and every day. Whether we choose a red or white shirt, whether we eat noodles or rice; almost each and everything we do, we have a choice. There’s really no such thing as no choice. It’s just seems so because we sometimes choose the easier way out straight away!

Whilst we are at “Choice”, it can be elementary placed into two main categories. One, those already made and two, those that are yet to be made. A decision of the past is a sunk one. It doesn’t matter anymore if it was right or wrong. What’s done is done! There’s no way to “turn back the clock” as Johnny Hates Jazz suggests. What’s important are those that you can still control, the choices you have yet to make; the decisions that affect your future! That’s the sole reason I can think of why it’s called “Choice” and not “Chosen”.

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