Tiffany Believes in Miracles

“Tiffany Believes InMiracles” by Esmond Ng 17/07/12 © Copyright

Tiffany Choo Yong Li (04/09/1987 – 13/07/2012)

You’re gone, yet you’re here,
You’ve left, yet in our lives inhabit.
Beautiful times they abide in our hearts,
Etched sorely in each every mind.

Love a word too faint describe,
All your friends of you surely none’d deny.
Fixedly you brought smiles and joy,
Typed boldly in our pages of life.

I’m sure I for many say this,
That I should have spent a bit, just a bit more time.
To catch up over coffee,
To have caught you in your prime.

Your luster flamed away fleetly,
The candle jealous’d of your shine.
But you lit up all of our nights,
And shone’d brightly in our darkest times.

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14 Ways to know if you’re Broken

1. You realize that you can feel all the emotional statuses appearing on your Facebook feed.
2. You realize you can zone out for extended periods without any recollection of what you did, how you got to somewhere, why were doing something, et cetera.
3. You have compulsive behavior over things you know don’t make a difference to the issue.
4. You need to control the verge of tearing the minute you are alone. e.g. In the washroom’s cubicle.
5. You have to fight back tearing at your colleague’s personal life sharing.
6. You can tremble your lips within 10 seconds, well your eyes within 20, and switch from all smiles to a face full of tears within 30.
7. You cry uncontrollably to Wedding proposal videos on YouTube.
8. You cry to memories half a year old.
9. You cry to imaginary scenarios you create.
10. You cry to anything and everything remotely touching.
11. You cry during Worship sessions at church.
12. You cry without realizing that you are.
13. You tell everyone that you’re alright but you know deep down that you are capable of swinging back to the lowest point at the snap of a finger.
14. You managed to say yes to all the above within the last 2 weeks.

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Can You Feel This?

“Can you feel this?” by Esmond Ng 09/10/11 © Copyright

They say Lovers’ hearts are connected,
Do you concur with they?
That one would feel the other’s pain,
Do you are you the same?

For this now shattering falling apart each worse than the last,
With every new day’s curse exponentially crushed.
Ceteris paribus but yet the air I feel thinning,
And how my breathing’s choking my own breathing.

In my silent screams I jerk sometimes looking up to see,
Nothing but what blur a person drowning might glimpse.
Beneath the salty sea of tears my head would downwards quiver,
Forms but another sea of which for me to go under.

I look into the mirror but all is your face in it,
And it hurts for me to see you in such manner.
But it’s my own crinkled lips and clatter of teeth that’s here,
My convulsions you go through too I wonder?

I love you and you said,
Each time I said you’d miss a beat.
How can something so right be so wrong,
That you’ll bear for me to give away?

You have on my chest rested and heard,
That it beats for you too surely.
And in my embrace you have felt,
The world of you in me.

How am I supposed to live without you,
When you take the reason my heart beats away?
How am I supposed to live,
If my world would cease without you to exist?

This whole ballad was written drenched,
And I can hardly see what was penned.
But every word was coughed out,
Amidst the breaths I tried to catch.

There is hardly any more beautiful,
Than waves that return.
To kiss the very shore it loves,
After each it’s sent away.

I know that at times things may beyond me be,
And none I can do but wish you smiles and better than me.
But if we are as magically linked as we both agreed,
My Queen, surely you can feel this.
Surely you can feel this.

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In Memory

In Loving Memory of Stephanie Tan Lai Chan (23/01/89 – 01/01/10)

“In Memory” by Esmond Ng 02/01/10 © Copyright

I would see you almost every other day,
But yet you, I’d not know beyond your name.
Too few hellos and goodbyes we’d have,
Time too haste, too fast to chase.

We shared too, too little exchanges;
Of hearty smiles and laughter candor.
Of our ups and downs, and cheer and fears.
Fair in times like these never, know not I will ever.

I’d never know how your demeanor,
Of what your friends about you say.
How you’d react to the funny things, I have yet no chance to say.
Know not I will ever, this friend I have yet to truly make.

For our God has chosen for you,
To His bosom side to stay.
And though we’ll all miss you in our each own ways,
We’d like you to know, you were not in vain.

For your memories and image they live on,
In those whom sighted you as you blazed along.
Like a comet gone too soon,
We’ll reminisce till we’re blazed out too.

In three weeks 21 you’d be,
“Happy Birthday, Steph!” to you from me.
A final teary “Goodbye” for now it seems,
Hearts, your family, friends and me.

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Your Smiles

“Your Smiles” by Esmond Ng © copyright 20/02/06

If a smile can win the world over,
Nothing is beyond Thy reach.
If a smile can make grey skies blue,
Why rainbows do we need?

A child’s smile innocently put,
Melt hearts without universal speech.
If smiles do miracles around us every each,
Then why not I see you smile more than you really mean?

Thee had said smiles better frowns than,
For someone may indeed be falling for them.
Losing only to a loving kiss,
A smile’s a gift kindly a beautiful thing.

I believe smiles genuine stems from happiness within,
Something we all long but forlorn it seems.
Why not let your smiles guide life along with steps take Thee,
For they mean you be most joyous at that instance be.

I seek a smile on you every second to see,
A smile on you brings many smiles to me.
For wrinkles not age but tells where smiles have been,
I wish those smiles were hath been because me.

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Your Moments – 911

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take. But by the moments that take your breath away.” Source: Unknown

How true. The overlooking view from the top of a subdued mountain. The serenity of nature. The first time your kite took flight. When first you heard “Daddy” from your child. The smiles you drew from your loved ones. The times you cherish together. The very love and mercy of God. How many times have you had your breath taken away this week? Remember them, for they are what you really live for.

911-Sept, 11. A special dedication towards the families, friends and loved ones of all those who were lost but now are found; in His loving hands. May God keep those who still hurt in His abundant love and grace. Amen. And till all wounds are healed, remember “your moments”.

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