Remembering Nadia

“Remembering Nadia” by Esmond Ng 29/01/12 © Copyright

(07 Feb 2006 – 29 Jan 2010)

Birth from pain, peace.
Stricken with hurt, relief.
Springs of disarray, order now.
Away torments, new hopes bring.
Love from us, to her unreservedly, remembering.

We miss you so much Nadia.

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14 Ways to know if you’re Broken

1. You realize that you can feel all the emotional statuses appearing on your Facebook feed.
2. You realize you can zone out for extended periods without any recollection of what you did, how you got to somewhere, why were doing something, et cetera.
3. You have compulsive behavior over things you know don’t make a difference to the issue.
4. You need to control the verge of tearing the minute you are alone. e.g. In the washroom’s cubicle.
5. You have to fight back tearing at your colleague’s personal life sharing.
6. You can tremble your lips within 10 seconds, well your eyes within 20, and switch from all smiles to a face full of tears within 30.
7. You cry uncontrollably to Wedding proposal videos on YouTube.
8. You cry to memories half a year old.
9. You cry to imaginary scenarios you create.
10. You cry to anything and everything remotely touching.
11. You cry during Worship sessions at church.
12. You cry without realizing that you are.
13. You tell everyone that you’re alright but you know deep down that you are capable of swinging back to the lowest point at the snap of a finger.
14. You managed to say yes to all the above within the last 2 weeks.

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God works in mysterious ways

“God works in mysterious ways when you allow Him into our lives. Earlier today I was pummeled by terrible bolts of mood-swings, those sudden moments where all one’s worst recollections congregate in an unannounced cacophony. Perhaps, it’s not something that an uninitiated could readily empathize. To prune, imagine depression in intermittent espresso shots. Just when I felt that it was going to be another dingy day, God squeezed a beaming smile from within me. I was dragging my disparaged spirit back towards office after lunch when I noticed a pram’d Caucasian boy of three thereabouts setting his eyes intently on me. The instant I drew up alongside him, he let out the cutest chuckle ever while waving his bitty hands up at me! His eyes lit up, resembling sparkles on a new year’s eve night. It was like he knew me. It was like God smiling at me through this little darling, reassuring me that He’s got me and everything is alright. I smiled wholeheartedly.” ~ Esmond Ng 11/01/12

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The Rainbow Forest

“The Rainbow Forest” by Esmond Ng 01/01/12 © Copyright

So I’ve been told, a forest of Rainbows.
One of which to canter through, outstretched,
My arms would I its colored branches catch?
And perhaps its palette tinct would all my lows.
Or would I choose instead to amble,
Perceive each seven as if deliberate in order?
Feel every warmth of every hue with my eyes shut gently,
My head slowly, circularly rolls, onto my back, resting.
I may not know where I at within,
This forest but would I care at all this place in, better.
For I can smile at here the indelible memories,
Perchance its cast of blushes would in future bring me more.

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